


Draw Our Own Constellations

by aristos



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-24
Updated: 2013-07-24
Packaged: 2017-12-21 05:33:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/896397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aristos/pseuds/aristos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karkat was trying to live, he truly was. He was trying to smile at least once daily, or read, or draw, or write, but it didn’t work. His smiles were false, drawings lies, and the words black and white symbols on a page that meant nothing to him. He tried to live, but there just wasn’t any life worth it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Draw Our Own Constellations

All of them. All of them. All of them. 

Karkat pressed his hands to his eyes in disgust, swiping away the cherry red tears that trickled lazily down his wrists like syrup and onto the map in front of him. He had been working on the constellations, trying to clear his mind, and he had opened his Trollian to chat to Terezi, to Gamzee, to Vriska, but at the sight of the multi coloured texts and various type quirks made tears pool in his eyes.

He had not had a Trollian notification in weeks. He had learnt through Dave, his last contact, that there had been a battle. Caliborn against the trolls. Not so much a battle, he determines, but a massacre. They were only children. 

It hurt him to think of them anymore. Many people would stay and lament the bad times, pouring over conversations gone wrong, fights that only cut deeper with every recall, but there were no bad times, not anymore. Any time that he had ever spent with them was a good time, because it was all he had left. 

Perhaps it was better this way? They would never accept him anyways, they’d never like him, or care… Only Terezi knew his blood colour, and even then she was a raving mad blind girl that had an obsession for announcing her jursidiction on stuffed animals. And now the only scrap of material possession he had of her, the girl he should have said everything to and yet didn’t, was a small teal symbol scrawled on one of the maps. 

A giggle escaped him. They all had their own strange aspects, didn’t they? Gamzee and his murder rages, Aradia and her destruction, Equius and his milk, Nepeta and her shipping wall. Karkat started to laugh louder, grinning at nothing at all. Oh, his friends are such freaks! 

His smile dropped.

Were. Were such freaks. He didn’t have any friends left anymore. 

His laughter turned to sobs. He didn’t bother trying to hold it in anymore. What would be the point? There was no one left to see him. 

He stared down at the constellations, lips pursed and eyes hazy with tears as they dropped down onto the maps. Earth. John was there, Dave was there, Rose was there, Dave was there. They all were together, they were all alive, they were all happy. Happy. 

Karkat was trying to live, he truly was. He was trying to smile at least once daily, or read, or draw, or write, but it didn’t work. His smiles were false, drawings lies, and the words black and white symbols on a page that meant nothing to him. He tried to live, but there just wasn’t any life worth it. 

He picked up the small pen, and shut his eyes slowly, trying to picture her smile behind his eyelids. Looking down at the map, he brushed his thumb over Terezi’s small doodle, swallowing down the lump in his throat as he sketched in the Earth, the pen grip hurting in his clenched fingers. He drew in Vriska next to that, then Equius, Gamzee, Eridan… 

His hands moved desperately, pen twisting and the nib shattering when he finally scrawled in his own, squeezed in, forgotten between Sollux and Nepeta. He’d never have to forget them again. Not now. Not when they’d be there. Up there.

His Trollian beeped. 

TG: nice job man

TG: she’d have liked it

**Author's Note:**

> With a sunset
> 
> And a moonrise not so far behind
> 
> To give us just enough light
> 
> To lay down underneath the stars
> 
> Listen to all the translations
> 
> Of the stories across the sky
> 
> We drew our own constellations.  
> \--- Constellations, Jack Johnson.


End file.
